Thursday, November 04, 2010

Godzilla vs Gamera

In honor of today being Godzilla's 56th birthday, I thought I'd answer a question posed by Michael Jones, "Who'd win in a fight between Godzilla and Gamera?"

My first reaction is to ask why can't they just get along? My second, as a comic book writer, is to point out that while fighting they'd realize they were on the same side and team-up to battle Gyaos and King Ghidorah and the aliens who control them.

There are many factors to take into consideration, size, speed, stamina, agility, powers, intelligence, which incarnation of each character we're talking about, and so on.

My initial reaction would be that Godzilla would win, he's bigger, probably stronger, occasionally cunning, has his radioactive breath, and seems pretty unstoppable. At a few points in his career arc he's even meaner. He is the king of the monsters after all. And it is his birthday.

Working against Godzilla though are his slow, plodding pace of movement and he's a little slow of mind.

However, Gamera is way more agile, especially considering he's a turtle. He can fly, perform gymnastics, he's got those tusks, he always takes a serious beating in his movies with gushing green blood and everything, put never gives up. He's pretty smart. He's also nicer. If it came down to it, the military of Japan would probably back Gamera against Godzilla.

Working against Gamera are his less impressive fireball breath, the fact that if you knock him on his back, he has a hard time getting back up, and he'd probably have to fight while simultaneously protecting small children.

If it's 60s Gamera vs 60s Godzilla it would be pretty even. If it were 90s Gamera vs 90s Godzilla, I vote for Gamera all the way. 90s Godzilla was the dullest, least interesting Godzilla who mostly stood around shooting beams at his enemies while the human characters watched on tv. 90s Gamera was pretty badass for a giant turtle and took on some serious foes, including hundreds of Gyaos at the end of his final movie. Millennium Godzilla, as aggressive as he looks, is a bit smaller and weaker, and would also probably lose. The Godzilla from Godzilla, Mothra, King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001) would destroy every incarnation named above as well as their enemies and never be stopped.

More interesting to contemplate is how they'd do in some other competitions:

Downhill Skiiing - Godzilla. He has that long tail for added balance and steering.

Toboggan - Gamera. He can lie on his back and accelerate with his leg jets.

Tether Ball - Godzilla. Longer more powerful arms and a better jump would allow him to dominate.

Bowling - Godzilla. Again, the arms, the tail for balance and two foreword looking eyes give him the edge.

Chess - Gamera. Godzilla wouldn't have the patience, or temperment to plan his moves ahead.

Battleship - Godzilla. He's shown his skill at destroying the real thing time and again.

Rockem Sockem Robots - Gamera. The controllers are practically built for his stumpy arms.

Duck Duck Goose - Gamera. His flying saucer jets would easily outpace the plodding steps of Godzilla.

Trivial Pursuit -  Neither monster has demonstrated any intellectual pursuits or interest in current events.

I hope this answers your question.



Robert Pope said...

I'd also add that Godzilla probably can drive the ball longer than Gamera, but has weaker skills with the short irons and can't putt worth a damn.

John Rozum said...

It's funny, I thought the same thing after my post was up. Golf: Godzilla for the reasons you cited. Mini Golf: Gamera. Ditto.

Robert Pope said...

It also occurs to me that in a basketball matchup, 'zilla would probably win, which would be the cue for Charles Barkley to show up.

Michael Jones said...

It was such a dumb fanboy question, I'm glad you put some thought into your answer. I concur with most of your answers (especially about wussy 90s Godzilla) yet I think he'd win hands down in a game of Pictionairy.